When A Woman Loses Herself
We are the nurturers; the protectors of our brood. And we are the ones who, for too long, have been told to stand behind man and be the lesser gender.
Whenever we enter relationships, we often give up our own sense of identity in order to submit to the other person's desires; to follow (even when our gut is telling us to stand up for ourselves) and forget our own innate ability to be the leaders of our destinies.
Whenever we are the head of our households, we often give up that nurturing aspect of ourselves in order be the "hunter, gatherer, provider". We forget our femininity because we feel, in this role, we must be more dominant (masculine).
Kicking and screaming, I have placed myself in both of these cages. Losing myself to "fit in", or to be "less of myself" in order to make someone else comfortable in their skin.
Too often, I have set aside the things that matter, at a heart level, in order to pursue those things, which in the end will hold no meaning.
I have chased after the "Almighty Dollar".
I have chased after men.
And in the end, I was left unfulfilled, unhappy, and at unrest.
As a single mom, I have learned, often painfully, the importance of balancing both aspects of my role to my son; doing my best to raise a good man when my personal examples have been less than stellar.
Through much trial and error, I have also learned that as a woman, it is unnecessary for me to overly assert (masculine) myself; that engaging with a softer approach (feminine) gets the point done more often than not.
I have learned that I am so much more than just a "mom"; that my needs are not bound by those of my child; that I do not have to fragment myself in order to feel whole; that I can do things for me... and not have to feel guilty about these choices.
Society wants to keep me in a box. Society wants to keep me small.
Hey Society! Kiss. my. ass!
I will no longer subscribe to your limited beliefs of how a woman "should" be.
And I will no longer subscribe to the limiting beliefs of my ancestors.
This is MY life!
It is my choice to be more or less than my authentic Self.
It is my choice to live on a smaller or larger scale.
My life is my choice!
She loves, loves, loves the BDSM lifestyle. Not only for the sexual aspects this lifestyle offers, but also for the raw intimacy she gets to experience when she is playing.
Her lifestyle was one that I once shunned until she educated me.
Since I have known her, I have watched her make choices based on the needs of the man in her life; choices that often leave her unfulfilled and seeking fulfillment from either other men or “retail therapy”.
In her current relationship, she has made the choice to set BDSM aside because her man is not into it.
This is the second relationship where she has given up on what she wants because it does not make her partner happy.
In her previous relationship, that man was into BDSM... just not with her.
This time around, this BF simply does not want to get involved and that is the end of the discussion for him.
Once again, she has made a choice to give up a big part of her life in order to make a man happy.
Will she continue to go through life unfulfilled... and lose herself in the process?
I hope not because she deserves so much more than what she is allowing herself to receive.
When a woman is lost, she has made the choice to not live in her magnificent.
A woman lost has made the choice to remain small and insignificant;.
A woman lost is someone who does not value herself and believes that only a man can validate her existence.
The time has come, ladies, for us to rise up and proclaim, “F**K THAT SHIT! We’re NOT gonna to take it ANYMORE!”
Whenever we enter relationships, we often give up our own sense of identity in order to submit to the other person's desires; to follow (even when our gut is telling us to stand up for ourselves) and forget our own innate ability to be the leaders of our destinies.
Whenever we are the head of our households, we often give up that nurturing aspect of ourselves in order be the "hunter, gatherer, provider". We forget our femininity because we feel, in this role, we must be more dominant (masculine).
Kicking and screaming, I have placed myself in both of these cages. Losing myself to "fit in", or to be "less of myself" in order to make someone else comfortable in their skin.
Too often, I have set aside the things that matter, at a heart level, in order to pursue those things, which in the end will hold no meaning.
I have chased after the "Almighty Dollar".
I have chased after men.
And in the end, I was left unfulfilled, unhappy, and at unrest.
As a single mom, I have learned, often painfully, the importance of balancing both aspects of my role to my son; doing my best to raise a good man when my personal examples have been less than stellar.
Through much trial and error, I have also learned that as a woman, it is unnecessary for me to overly assert (masculine) myself; that engaging with a softer approach (feminine) gets the point done more often than not.
I have learned that I am so much more than just a "mom"; that my needs are not bound by those of my child; that I do not have to fragment myself in order to feel whole; that I can do things for me... and not have to feel guilty about these choices.
Society wants to keep me in a box. Society wants to keep me small.
Hey Society! Kiss. my. ass!
I will no longer subscribe to your limited beliefs of how a woman "should" be.
And I will no longer subscribe to the limiting beliefs of my ancestors.
This is MY life!
It is my choice to be more or less than my authentic Self.
It is my choice to live on a smaller or larger scale.
My life is my choice!
HERE’S A STORY..
She loves, loves, loves the BDSM lifestyle. Not only for the sexual aspects this lifestyle offers, but also for the raw intimacy she gets to experience when she is playing.Her lifestyle was one that I once shunned until she educated me.
Since I have known her, I have watched her make choices based on the needs of the man in her life; choices that often leave her unfulfilled and seeking fulfillment from either other men or “retail therapy”.
In her current relationship, she has made the choice to set BDSM aside because her man is not into it.
This is the second relationship where she has given up on what she wants because it does not make her partner happy.
In her previous relationship, that man was into BDSM... just not with her.
This time around, this BF simply does not want to get involved and that is the end of the discussion for him.
Once again, she has made a choice to give up a big part of her life in order to make a man happy.
Will she continue to go through life unfulfilled... and lose herself in the process?
I hope not because she deserves so much more than what she is allowing herself to receive.
When a woman is lost, she has made the choice to not live in her magnificent.
A woman lost has made the choice to remain small and insignificant;.
A woman lost is someone who does not value herself and believes that only a man can validate her existence.
The time has come, ladies, for us to rise up and proclaim, “F**K THAT SHIT! We’re NOT gonna to take it ANYMORE!”