Musings and What-not

Everything is changing , and it is doing so at a rate that can make even the day-to-day tasks seem daunting.

I have cried enough tears to fill an ocean, sending myself into the deepest abyss, pondering... Will he be okay when I'm gone? I've spent so much time worrying and stressing about what will happen to him tomorrow that, at times, I have allowed precious moments of my today slip carelessly slip through my hands. Germany has its Autobahn... the road I travel has a beautiful yet mysterious companion that is Autism. My journey has been one of great fascination... and frustration. There have been many twists, turns, bumps, and detours along the way. One moment, I am cruising along at a comfortable speed, letting the wind caress my face, and in a flash, I encounter a pot hole that rattles me to the core.

Most of us on this path, the path of Autism, are quite familiar with the poem having to do with Holland.  Many of us may not have planned to give birth to Autism, but for reasons we may never fully know, Autism had plans for us. As parents to these children, are we to look at ourselves as being uber special in some way? Are we truly the Chosen Ones? Are we the only ones who were somehow more prepared than others to handle a life that would be altered in unimaginable ways?

A play on words from a popular movie... yet, there's a lot of  truth  to them.

Change  is inevitable. Every day, we change our minds; change lanes, and hopefully, our underwear too! But what matters most is how  present  and  ready  we are when these changes come about. Do we use these reminders as a means to appreciate where we are, or are we too caught up with no thoughts toward our actions?

With so many children being diagnosed with Autism every day, it is easy for someone to feel hopeless, shameful, guilty, angry, and/or resentful.

As I read story after story of people performing and supporting genetic testing to eradicate autism... prenatal style, I can't help but feel sick to my stomach. This continued intolerance of a community that only wants to love, be loved and accepted, seems to be at the forefront of possible extinction . Why the fear ? I'd like to think that being in the midst of centuries old civil unrest and living in communities where mass genocide at the hands of those who have overstepped their boundaries and have become power hungry to be a significantly worse "fate".